The Rhythm of Fear
- Lusu Mwah
- Jan 16
- 2 min read
The waves are crashing onto the edge of the boat. Enough to make my heart dance out of sync. This is a rhythm I am unfamiliar with but know all too well. I try to tell myself to breathe and that all will be okay. But will it? I change my focus from the waves to the sky, but still, I see the same hue of blue as the sun whispers goodbye. How will I make it through the night?
The winds grow loud and furious like monsters of the abyss. Fear sets the tempo of this rhythm, and my heart cannot stop dancing out of sync. Everything one does flows from the heart, and if my heart continues to dance like a white man... I am afraid there will be chaos.
I try to self-regulate as I slowly breathe out. There are so many things that are out of my control, I realise. The Earth rotating on its axis and revolving around the sun is out of my control, the blood pulsing through my veins is out of my control, and the life I have been given is out of my control. Why, then, do I try so hard to be the puppeteer and jeopardise my own life? I see that I am not in the vicinity of wisdom who calls out in the streets.
Silence echoes in my ear. There is no rhythm of fear. I take a deep breath and look out into the darkness. I free up my hands and wait.
The waves are crashing onto the edge of the boat. Enough to make my heart dance out of sync yet, it is at peace. I know that it will be okay because I am not in control.
Ah, the mystery! I like the question mark you have left for us to puzzle over - how to have peace when one is not in control. It was hard to get through the first part (it may have been hard for you to write it). I was glad for the resolution - or at least the peaceful lull at the end.